Something a Little Deep
I’ve started to write this several times in my mind but didn’t get very far. It’s still raw and emotional and painful to talk about, but it has changed things at the studio so I want to talk about it. I’m excited about the direction I’m moving in and I know you will be too!
The morning of May 11th I was sitting on the couch, wearing my fuzzy robe, sipping hot coffee, and preparing to re-open the studio. I started scrolling Facebook and somewhere around 8am my phone started ringing. It was my older brother. My first thought was how strange it was that he was calling so early, but I cheerfully answered the phone with a, “heeeellllloooo.”
The news he had to share with me made my heart stop. My mom had collapsed at work and was taken to the ER via ambulance. He was in the parking lot but, due to Covid, wouldn’t be allowed to go in with her. He said my dad was on the way and he would let me know as soon as they knew something. We hung up. I immediately told Isaac and we prayed. I paced and prayed and paced and prayed. Thirty minutes turned into an hour. I distinctly remember thinking that if we hadn’t gotten an update yet, she must have died. However, I quickly pushed the thought away and began pleading with God not to let her die.
About an hour and a half after his first call, he called again. He was sobbing and said, “Amy, she died!” I fell to the ground practically screaming, “No Lee, no! She can’t have died! Did you see her? How do they know it was her? Maybe they have the wrong person and she’s still in the ER but alive.” And then I just wailed.
That morning changed my life and forever altered the lives of my children. You see, while my mom lived nine hours away from us, she was here for every birthday, every Thanksgiving, and every work holiday she could be. She was super involved with her grandchildren. She was my best friend.
A few days later, my brothers and I, along with a few of my aunts, were looking through photos to put in the slideshow for the viewing. We were all telling stories and remembering vacations, when it became apparent that Mom was hardly in any pictures with us. Of course she wasn’t. She was always the one taking the pictures. We did find some Olan Mills family portraits. A few from when my oldest brother was a toddler, maybe one of the three of us in the seven and under range, a couple from our church directory when I was in middle school, and that was it. We all kind of looked at each other and said, “that’s it?” How sad is it that the last portrait I have of my mother and I is from my wedding fifteen years ago? I would give almost anything to have a portrait of her with me as a baby or even a toddler to hang in my home now.
It’s possible there are more pictures of her with us laying in the bottom of a bin somewhere on a negative strip, but we don’t know where they are. Or maybe there is a CD in some drawer that has a few. It’s highly probable that we’ll just never know. I’m sure most negatives have been lost or long since discarded.
Now, fast forward to the beginning of June. I had one of my long time clients in the studio. We were doing her son’s twelve month session. As we were wrapping up, I mentioned to her that she should bring her usb that had her previous sessions on it back with her for their ordering appointment and I would put the new session on it so they could keep it all in one place. “Oh, I have no idea where that thing is at,” she said. I did the slow look up and said, “wait, what? You don’t know where it is? So have you printed any of the images from the sessions on it?” She just dug through her diaper bag and said, “no, I just haven’t had time to get around to it. I want to, but I’ll have to try to find the USB.” Now let me say I adore this client. She is the sweetest and we have become friends as a result of working together for the last several years, but, in the moment, I could have screamed. I felt like I had let her down. Then it occurred to me that I had also let her children down and I had to turn around and choke back the tears.
You guys, this can’t continue to be the ending to your beautiful sessions. If all I do is hand you a USB that gets lost in a drawer, I am not serving you well. I WANT to serve you well. So from this point forward, I am shooting for wall art. Let’s get your face and the faces of your children and family on the walls of your home. Can you even imagine a better gift that you could give them than the gift of visibly displaying your love for them? Imagine your baby growing up with an image of them as a newborn on their nursery wall. They start out staring up at it, then crawling by it, toddling by it, and then playing with friends in that room. Tell me your child won’t know how special they are and how much you love them.
We have a 36×48 family portrait above our bed. All four of the kids love to look up on it, say who each kid is and then typically comment on how Isaac and I have aged. (Kids. They keep you humble.) The thing that I love most about the portrait is that it is a gateway for me to talk about crazy things they did at that age, or tell them about when they were born, or how they got their name. We always talk about something new it seems, but it always ends in cuddles, kisses, and I love you’s. And that my friends, makes that portrait on my wall absolutely priceless.
I invite you to call me to talk more about creating something you’ll adore for your walls. Let’s give your kids the gift of self-confidence, assurance, and a visual representation of your love.
Contact me today to schedule a time to chat about what I can create for you!